While I'm soaking up the sun in Orlando, I have a great guest post from Big Family Little Income. Bruce is a Dad, so I was thrilled when he contacted me offering to guest post! I love having a different perspective for a change! Hope you enjoy his post!
serious retail therapy.
Three hours after she ducked off to the supermarket for some 'basics' she arrived
home with the back seat full of glorious purchases and started handing out goodies
like Santa at a work Christmas party. I expected milk, but Tracey bought the whole cow.
Among the things my wife came home with were three potted plants, window
putty, a ceramic fairy and a spatula. Sadly, there was no milk to be heard of.
"Here!" she said, handing me a huge bag. "I bought you some clothes."
She sure did. There were half a dozen pullover type tops in there, although clearly
Tracey hadn't been clothes shopping for me in about 20 kg because everything
except for one top was way too small.
This one item which fitted, a sporty red tracksuit type top, reminded me of the sort
of thing I was wearing when I was at primary school over twenty five years ago -
or over thirty five years ago but what's a decade between friends. My new retro red
top started this season on the shelves at $39 but Tracey snapped it up for miserly
"I can't believe they struggled to sell this," I said to Tracey. I'm always surprised
when the sort of designs I grew up with leap out of the opportunity shops and onto
the hangers in fashionable stores.
"They had matching pants," Tracey informed me eagerly. Oh please, no.
"Ooooo, sounds nice," I said with no enthusiasm at all. No it didn't sound nice,
it sounded like she was trying to get me belt up. This is the sort of outfit I expect
the geriatrics are wearing behind the closed doors of the retirement home up the
road. "Do they come in parachute silk?"
The real problem with daddy fashion in my house is everything looks great at the
shops with a red discount sticker on it. Not that Tracey buys me stuff just because
it has a discount sticker. Oh no. She likes to wait until they're discounting the
discounted stuff before she considers how badly something will clash with my
existing wardrobe. I like to think she's dressing me down to keep me safe from
loose women, but when I suggested this she laughed at me to the point she was
gasping for air, so maybe not.
But I insist on looking on the bright side, and excitingly, if this red tacky tracky top
from my primary school days is fashionable now, then I foresee in about another
five years the things from when I was at high school might become fashionable to.
And by things, I of course mean me.
To read more humorous stories from Bruce, please visit him here.